Hi Taylor! How are you? How is life going as America's new sweetheart? You look like you're enjoying yourself!

Personally you make me sick! No hate here but its just the truth. Let's get one thing clear darling... YOU owe Kanye West a steak dinner at the very least (if you ever do decide to buy him dinner; buy a meal for yourself - you look like you need it) because you owe that man your life; he basically made you.

I won't lie. When your acceptance speech at the 2009 VMA's got bum rushed by Mr. West last year, I did feel sorry for you at first. You looked miserable, shocked and embarrassed. That was until I actually thought about how this "accident" actually boosted your career. Miss Swift your are officially official now aren't you?. No record label marketing plan could have achieved this. Your sudden ascent to the top of the charts reeks of supernatural voodoo intervention. The publicity, press and spike in your sales is not an indication of your talent or whatever you call that sound coming out of your mouth. Its more like the result of a backlash against Kanye with White America and its legion of lemmings basically thinking "how dare that n***** disrespect one of our own".

Regardless of the rumours going around that the whole VMA "incident" was staged; the heart of the matter is that you STILL don't matter at least in the eyes of serious music fans. With all the hoopla and ballyhooing going on about great you supposedly are; I STILL cannot sing one of your choruses or even name ONE of your songs. That is wack.

I have to begrudgingly admit that we will be stuck with you for a while though. As America's new chosen child, you are now too rich, too loved and too protected for us to get rid of you now. So enjoy the run because word to The Pussycat Dolls, it doesn't last. Somewhere, there is another blonde haired, blue eyed girl who will take your place and the inevitable cycle of doom will continue without you or at least until your label are done sodomising your freedom and bank balance. One day you will be OUT OF HERE!!! All I can say to you is that you're lucky it was Kanye West that stepped to you. If O.D.B. were still alive (do a Google search about how he shut down the '98 Grammy's in Puff's face), then you really would have had a problem.